Monday, March 14, 2011

Ian Walkers me right into a Dear Keith.

I need to start off by saying Ian Walker.. aka @walkerbigtalker is awesome. I mean really, I creep  him during game day skates and bug him about looking at the back of his head while waiting for player interviews and he hasn't blocked me or reported me to the police..... yet. That is win number 1. Win number 2? THIS (skip past the Tanner stuff it doesn't matter.....ok yes it does, my almost 3 year old has a huge crush on him). Unfortunately, this brings me to another instalment of " Dear Keith"

Dear Keith,

First off, Skinny jeans? really? ahhh Don't get me started. Don't...even...get me started. I'm not taking that bait. After my last Dear Keith my mom messaged me and told me I was being a little hard on you, I laughed it off thinking you'd never find out about it and I didn't give it much thought. Now?..... I'm still not sorry. Maybe now you'll do something about it but if you still want to be lazy, I've got one last offer. You are here in less then a month, bring all your pants. I don't have tickets to the game so I'll sit outside Rexall and hem them for you, I can have it done in the time it takes to play a game. Maybe if I'm lucky Ian will bring me a beer (AHEM).

Last game there was something started on twitter that for every Canucks goal scored, fans would text a number and donate $5 towards relief efforts in Japan. Well, I went one step better, or so I thought. I told Derek Jory that on top of that, for every shot on goal you had I'd donate $5 and for every hip check you made I'd donate $10. Looking back at the past while, I thought it was a safe bet for a few donated dollars.  According to my sources you had four of your shots blocked... FOUR!...none got through. Also, you completely missed with the hip check. You are not helping that situation, I expect you to pick it up next game. As far as chirping, it's what short people do, you should know this. How about you score a goal and maybe I'd have something to compliment you on..............Boom?

I'm Sorry, Really, it's just to easy. You are my favourite player.


p.s. For the Record, Ian is the king of interview bombings. He's Walker Bombed  After Hours so many times this season I can't even keep track. His methods a little different, he walks by at least once, pretending to be looking at something on his phone.
Ian darling, You wear whatever you want  when you're on the Sportsnet panel, if anyone bugs you I got your back(even though you added an extra letter in my twitter name in your article), anything is better then rolled up jeans. Don't worry Bif,  I promise not to start a blog called 'Write Me That, Walker'.

In all fairness I'll leave you guys with these 2 pictures from the Behind The Lens galleries

These pants appear to be about the right length, but don't get me started on those socks.


  1. Dear Christine,

    1. Congrats
    2. I need to start reading your stuff more often because you rock!

    Dear Keith

    I can respect the laziness of not wanting to hem yourself, but not stopping by a mall to drop them off? Come on....PS. Last resort mister lazy, roll them inwards and staple...I have done this before and it works just fine ;)

  2. SOG: check
    Hip check: check
    Maybe Keith heard you!

    I was really hoping he was responsible for Clutterbuck landing in the Canucks bench after seeing him right there when the camera cut to it. Alas, he was not, but it was still good times.

  3. Nice job on finding those photos! I wonder if he rolled up his jeans during his meet and greet. Too bad I didn't see your blog earlier.

  4. @Jacquie - thanks!
    @Joan- I can pretend anyway right?
    @Miydreams- hahahah, I feel bad people who have read this will now be looking at his pants if they see him.